Fantasy, mystery, thrillers, horror, historical. . .I write it all, and review it too!

Jun 13, 2012

Shorter blurb

The consensus on my writers groups and the KDP Forum is that my blurb is too long. I've come up with a shorter one. Try this on for size:

His past has been erased, his future is uncertain, but he knows one thing—in the coming revolution he must choose which friend to support and which to betray.

The Dragonkin have ruled the human race for centuries, but now the eastern territories have broken away and a blight has left thousands of humans destitute. Assassinations and riots plague the cities.

While the empire’s future is in peril, one man struggles to reclaim his past. Recorro lost his wife to the Gatherers, shadowy beings that prowl the streets on moonless nights. Those who witness their passing are forever changed. Recorro can remember nothing about his wife beyond the fact that she existed.

Aimless and struggling with despair, Recorro joins the army gathering to crush the rebels. What he discovers there may answer all his questions, and topple the empire he swore to uphold.

3 comments:

  1. I had to re-write several blurbs for my Amazon listings. I've now come up with a four-paragraph formula.

    1. One or two sentences laying out the main character and their recent past.

    2. Two or three (short) sentences laying out the opening premise of the book.

    3. One or two sentences raising the question of how events may unfold in the book.

    4. One or two sentences comparing the book to works with a similar plot, theme, or feel.

    If you keep all of the above very succinct, I think it can provide a lot of information without being too wordy.

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